Of the Quibbler and Dumbledore's Army
by A Million Ways
Summary: Random one-shots associated with Of Bare Feet. Stuff that didn't fit in the main story (most of it happened before), but my brain made me write. Ron and Luna interact over the years.
1. After the DA

**From this point on, this story will be a series of one-shots. They won't always be in chronological order, so I'll put dates on each one. I'm hoping most will be, but I'm also just kind of writing what's in my head at this point. For example, this chapter is a quick flashback to Ron's 5th year…this is one of those moments he couldn't make sense of until years later.**

* * *

 _ **December 1995**_

Ron stepped out the Room of Requirement with Hermione. _If I get caught by Umbridge because Harry's taking his time, Merlin help me,_ he thought. The D.A. meeting had been fun, but he would rather have been in front of the fire, a bottle of butterbeer, daydreaming about Christmas. With Hermione and Harry, of course.

Ginny and Luna stood in the empty corridor, giggling together. When they noticed Ron, Ginny looked at Luna, who stared at Ron, unblinking.

"You'd better get back to the common rooms before Umbridge catches you," he hissed at them, glancing toward the end of the hall.

Luna stared at him with those protuberant eyes. "Who?"

"Umbridge," Ginny whispered, nudging Luna in the side.

"Who's that?" Luna's voice was high and ethereal, and she glanced toward a suit of armor, as if it could answer her question.

"Short, fat, stupid bow in her hair?" Ron mimed Umbridge's bow.

"Hem, hem?" added Ginny, imitating Umbridge's tic.

Luna looked at them blankly

Hermione tapped her foot impatiently and said, "she's taught DADA since the start of the year."

"Oh, _her_. Yes, she's got a bad infestation of Garinkles. Makes you downright unpleasant. I do hope she finds some time to visit the Orient over the Holiday. The Wizards in the East capture and eliminate them with hardly a thought…"

The group went silent, and Hermione tried to catch Ron's eye. He knew if he looked at her, he'd burst out laughing, so he inspected his trainers.

The door re-appeared, and Marrietta Edgecombe crept out. "Loony!" she said, sounding annoyed, "get back to the common room and clean up those stupid turnips."

"Dirigible Plums." Luna didn't seem to notice the insult or nickname.

"Flitwick's going to have kittens if those things are everywhere. Anthony told you this morning—"

"You'll thank me later. They're very good for knowledge retention." She looked to the Gryffindors. "If you lot would like some, I can drop them off with the Fat Lady."

"I think we're okay," Ginny said gently, "you should probably go."

"You should probably go, too," Marietta added. "I think Harry and Cho…" she gestured toward the now-empty wall and rolled her eyes. Hermione nodded knowingly. Ginny scowled a bit. Ron was confused.

Luna lowered her eyes and shook her head, "he really should have heeded my warning about the nargles…" She looked up a moment later, as if mildly surprised to find everyone else standing in the hall with her. "Well then, Happy Christmas, Ron!" She beamed at him (and only him, to his confusion). Then she floated down the hall toward Ravenclaw Tower, Marietta shortly behind.

"Dotty," whispered Ron as he followed Hermione and Ginny to the common room. "Wait, so why aren't we waiting for Harry?"

Hermione spun around and looked into his eyes, as if figuring something out. "Honestly Ronald, it's like you're a child."

Ginny giggled in agreement. "We'll explain when you're older."

Ron was still confused.


	2. Before Australia

**May 30, 1998**

Kingsley looked at the four teenagers in front of him. "I can make this happen. I can do it with no questions asked. I can even send someone to assist—"

"I know how to undo the charm!" interrupted Hermione, her grip on Ron's hand becoming painful. "We just need the documents to travel freely in Australia. And a new tent. We lost ours, but Bill can do the charms if we ask, we just need the Ministry's permission. We want to use the proper channels." Ron pressed back against her hand, willing her to stop talking. She'd done nothing but babble since they'd gotten to Kingsley's office.

"Miss Granger," he said, staring hard at her, and she shrank back into her chair. "As I was saying, this," he waived his hand over the parchment on the desk, "is not a problem."

"Thank you," she breathed. The parchment was a short letter (written by all _four_ of them, since Ginny refused to be left out again) outlining the plans to retrieve Hermione's parents. And the help they needed from the Ministry.

"However," all four of them took in a deep breath, and Ron could swear Ginny rolled her eyes. "I have a favor to ask." He turned his attention to Harry. "I appreciate the testimony each of you has provided. It will help the Ministry in the capture and prosecution of many remaining Death Eaters. As you know, your testimony about what happened this past year at Hogwarts and elsewhere is private. Some pieces may be made public during the trials, but until then the files are closed."

"Thank you." Harry murmured, and the other three nodded.

Kingsley continued, "But I receive demands almost daily for more information. I'm not asking you to release the full story. I'm simply asking you to give the reporters _something_. We want to respect your privacy, Potter, but the public is clamouring to know what happened. If no one speaks to the press soon, they're going to begin creating their own versions of events…"

As he trailed off, Hermione narrowed her eyes. She, like Harry, knew exactly what the magical press was capable of doing.

"Yeah, like Harry's going to walk up to Rita Skeeter and just pour his heart out," Ginny said. As far as anyone could tell, Skeeter was the only Prophet reporter who hadn't been killed, arrested or exiled during the war.

"Not just Harry," replied Kingsley gently, looking to Ginny (who scowled at him). "The public needs to hear from you or Mr. Longbottom or Mr. Finnegan about what happened at the school…the rumours…"

"Are actually true, and you know it. Do you really want an honest recounting of last year? The Crucios and beatings and the Ministry's role?" Ginny's eyes blazed with anger as Harry gently patted her shoulder.

"Yes. Yes, I do. And I will make it clear that we will do everything in our power to prevent it from happening again. In order to do that, we need your help and corroboration." Kingsley raised his eyebrows at the Ginny.

She stared back, thinking. Then Hermione spoke up. "So you'll only help us if we talk to the press?"

Kingsley steepled his fingers and looked back at the four, speaking slowly. "I'll help you regardless. I'm just hoping you'll see that it might be mutually beneficial…and that if you're leaving the country for a few weeks, it might be best to let everything come out while you're gone."

Hermione and Harry had a silent conversation. From what Ron could tell (from Harry's almost imperceptible head shakes), Harry didn't want to tell the press anything. But Hermione saw the advantage. And she was quite annoyed at Harry. Ron squeezed her hand and said, "Kingsley…er…" the man was a bit frightening, "Minister Shacklebolt…can we have some time to think it over? We don't intend to leave for another few weeks, and that gives us plenty of time to decide what to share."

Harry gave him a grateful smile, and Hermione relaxed a little.

"Very well then," said Kingsley, "I'll be expecting your owl in the next few days. And despite all this, I want you four to go home and _relax_. You've been through enough. And I have more interviews and meetings, so I'll let you go."

As the teens shuffled out of the Minister's office, they came across Luna Lovegood sitting in the waiting area. Her wand was over her ear, and she wore the same yellow dress she wore to Bills' wedding as she inspected a map of some kind. Her hair was covered in a fine layer of dust.

"Luna!" Ginny cried, running to her friend. The two hugged (a cloud of dust billowing around them) and Luna looked over at the other three.

"I'm happy to see you so well, Harry!" she said brightly.

"Thanks, Luna."

She looked at the three of them with concern. "You know Voldemort's dead, right? There's no need to look so stressed. Especially you, Hermione. You look like you've got a Muddlekin hiding in your hair, and he's sucked away all your happiness."

"It's nice to see you, Luna," Hermione replied, choosing to ignore the second half of what Luna had said.

Luna stepped away from Ginny and placed her hands on Hermione's shoulders, peering deep into her eyes. "You look nearly as bad as you did after…after…" She paused for a second and gathered her thoughts, "…when we were at Bill's. Is Ron caring for you well?" She looked to Ron, wide eyed and raised her eyebrows.

"Uh…" Ron said, "I'm doing my best?"

"Oh good. That's all we can do! I'd invite you over for a calming draught, but as you know, my house was blown up in the war. Daddy and I are repairing it. You can come get a draught when it's fixed!"

The three friends exchanged a covert look, no one wanting to admit what happened at the Lovegoods'.

"Luna, blown up? What happened?!" asked Ginny. Ron _assumed_ Harry had filled his sister in on the past year, but apparently some details were left out. They shared a panicked look.

Luna's eyes darkened, a look out of place on her usually mild face. "It seems the Death Eaters were determined to get Daddy and the Quibbler to stop supporting Harry. He won't talk much about it…he was in Azkaban, you know. He won't talk much at all...since he got out. But it seems they…" Luna's eyes clouded more and she shook her head. "But the ministry's helping us put it back together, and they're taking my statement about the kidnapping, so that's good! Maybe I can even convince them to look seriously into the problem with the vampires!"

Kingsley stepped from his office. "Miss Lovegood, we can begin."

She bounced toward the door when Hermione interrupted. "Wait, Luna!"

Ron felt a surge of adrenaline. Was she going to tell Luna about what happened _now?_ Without discussing it with him and Harry? He knew she felt guilty (she was, after all, the one who had reductoed the entire second story), but this was not the time nor the place.

Luna turned back. "Yes, Hermione?"

Hermione pulled her arm away from Ron. "I was just wondering...if we were to talk to the press, could it be the Quibbler? Would you write something up for us?

Harry paused just before a protest left his lips. He seemed to think for a second, then said, "Brilliant!"

Ginny was bouncing with excitement. "That's perfect! The Quibbler could run all the stories! You could talk to Neville and Seamus, and maybe even the Potterwatch crew. Run a special issue. It'll sell out in minutes!"

It was a brilliant idea. Talking to Rita Skeeter or someone had risks; who knew what she'd write? But they trusted Luna, and even if she was odd, she'd be honest and respect their wishes.

Luna's face fell. "I don't think the Quibbler is going to come out for a long time. We have no way to print it."

The image of the destroyed printing press leapt into Ron's mind. Of course. They'd not only destroyed Luna's house, but her family's livelihood as well. Now he felt as guilty as Hermione.

The room was quiet for a minute. Then Harry broke the silence. "Luna, do you remember Sirius Black?"

"That pleasant convict who was also your Godfather and played in that band?"

"Yeah, him. After everything, I got of all of his stuff. Including his vaults, so I have more money than I know what to do with. Uh, I'd be happy to buy you and your father a new printing press, maybe even a storefront in Diagon Alley in exchange for letting us tell our story."

"You'd do that?" Luna asked, looking misty-eyed. "We can repay you. Surely we'll make the money back quickly if you're in the first issue."

Harry grinned down at Ginny, who squeezed him into a hug. "No need. Consider it a friend helping a friend."

Beside Ron, Hermione let out a long breath and leaned her head against his shoulder. Ron wondered if this would soften her guilt. It certainly softened his.

"But I have one condition," Harry continued.

Luna stiffened. "What's that?"

"I won't do this alone. You can't just interview me. Ron and Hermione have to be included in everything. You present us as a team. No more 'Chosen One' or 'Boy Who Lived', okay?"

A scowl darkened Ginny's face, but it was gone as quickly as it started. Luna, on the other hand, beamed in understanding.

"Why don't we meet up at the Burrow in a couple of days?" said Ron. "That gives you time to prepare, and us time to figure out what we want to release." Hermione and Harry nodded in agreement.

Luna beamed at him as well, the dust flying off her shoulders as she walked into Kingsley's office.

A few days later, Ron was sitting in the kitchen eating a sandwich when Luna stepped from the floo. Her clothes were cleaner and she held stacks of parchment and an assortment of quills. The butterbeer corks were around her neck, and her wand was behind her ear.

"I would have apparated, but they won't be ready for my test until next week." she said as she spread her things out on the table. As she settled into a chair, she looked around the kitchen, then to Ron. "Your mum, she's not doing well, is she?"

Ron looked at the stacked dishes and dusty countertops. Fleur came by every couple of days to help out, but beyond that no one was really functioning. His mum was still in bed, despite the fact that it was midmorning. His dad was at work, but Ron wasn't sure he actually got anything done there. When he'd visited, Arthur simply shuffled papers around aimlessly. Ron _should_ have helped out, but the thought of doing anything productive when the house still felt like a funeral was overwhelming. Like the rest of his family, he slept, he ate, he answered owls when he felt like it…Hermione got him out of the house to plan for the trip to Australia from time to time. But everything he did carried the weight of losing Fred.

Instead of waiting for an answer, Luna murmured a few spells and set the kitchen to cleaning itself. Dishes jumped up to be washed and the feather duster began moving among the knick-knacks. Ron raised his eyebrows.

"I can teach you the spells…daddy's not doing too well either...I've picked some things up." Ron nodded in understanding. Luna continued, "Neville can get you a hollyhock bush if you wish. It will attract better spirits."

They made awkward eye contact across the table, unsure how to address, well, everything. The Weasleys' grief over Fred. The Lovegood's house. Xenophilia's imprisonment. The Malfoys. Luckily, Ginny and Harry appeared from Merlin-knows-where (Ron learned not to question). Harry looked nervous, but Ginny hugged Luna fiercely.

"I'll go grab Hermione so those three can talk to you. Have Harry come find me when you're ready for my interview."

Hermione came down a few moments later carrying her own stack of papers. The three of them had spent the last few days compiling their story: what they wanted to share, what they wanted to keep to themselves. They'd settled on a story, one that would keep certain pieces of knowledge (such as horcruxes and Deathly Hallows) out of the public eye, but would answer some of the questions Kingsley had sent them.

There was a second list; the list of what they'd share with Luna off the record. After much discussion (most of which, to Ron's chagrin, included Ginny), they'd decided they owed her the truth on some things. As long as she promised not to publish the information.

And so they began to tell their story. Hermione handed out parchment highlighting which parts of the story they'd each share and what details were included. From there, she'd outlined what they could share with Luna "off the record."

Harry started, telling the story of their escape from Bill's wedding, and giving the overview of their mission. The morning wore on with the whole story. The splinching, the camping. Ron had a lump in his throat as he explained that he left the other two "to visit Bill and find out what was going on elsewhere," (the explanation they'd developed).

The story of the Lovegood's was on Ron's list. He explained that they'd had questions for Xeno about important Ravenclaw artifacts (Harry didn't want to talk about the Hallows). When he got to the part with the Erumpet horn, he glanced over at Hermione. She fidgeted her hands on the table and he grabbed one firmly before continuing on with the version they'd developed.

"The snatchers came while we were talking to your dad. We had to get away quickly because they wanted Harry, and they thought I was down with Spattergoit."

"How did they know you lot were there?" Luna asked.

Ron couldn't tell if she was suspicious or curious. He pushed forward with his explanation: as close to the truth as he could get without throwing Xeno under the Knight Bus. "We think the Snatchers were watching him, they thought he knew where Harry was." Ron kept talking, not giving Luna any more opportunity to ask questions. "So we had to create a distraction to give ourselves time to get away. Uh, your dad had an Erumpet Horn in the middle of the house, so…"

"So I ducked one of his curses and it hit the horn," said Hermione, covering her face with her hands. "And then the only way out was to _Reducto_ the floor…Luna, I'm so sorry! It was our only chance, and I thought if the snatchers saw Harry they'd let your dad alone, but they took him to Azkaban anyway. If there's anything we can do to make it up to you—"

Luna cut her off. "A house is just a building. My home is with my father, and that is still intact. Besides, now I can re-paint the inside." She paused, scribbling on some parchment, then looked up at them. "You broke out of Gringotts, too. Flew a dragon through their ceiling…and from what I hear, you Fiendfyred the Room of Requirement…"

"That was Crabbe…" muttered Hermione.

"You lot leave a lot of rubble in your wake when you're determined. Anyhow, I have a favor to ask."

Everyone looked at her expectantly.

"I appreciate that you vanquished a Dark Lord…but next time, could you be a bit less destructive? The Nargles are all a tizzy trying to re-establish their colonies."

Ron found himself grinning. "Never change, Luna."

"I don't intend on it. Do you?"

The group relaxed a bit more, and continued telling their story. At lunchtime, Harry grabbed leftover roast from the icebox as Hermione explained how they'd been captured and taken to Malfoy Manor.

"And…and you know most of what happened there…" Hermione concluded, her voice drifting off. They each had things that were hard to talk about. For Ron, it was the moment he angrily apparated away from his two best friends. Somehow that moment was even worse than the moment Fred died. For Harry it was whatever happened in the forest. And for Hermione, it was Bellatrix LeStrange.

But midafternoon, the story had been told. Luna was horrified at the prospect of Horcruxes, and agreed that they should be kept out of the press. "We can just say that Voldemort turned several artifacts into weapons, and you had to destroy the weapons before you could kill him," she said, writing in a shorthand that only she could read. "I have interviews with a few more people. Ginny, Neville and Seamus about Hogwarts. I'll see if I can get Susan and Hannah and even Anthony to give me some quotes as well. I've got Lee set to talk about Potterwatch." She looked at Ron, "would George be willing to talk, too?"

"As long as Charlie hasn't gotten him drunk again, you're probably good. But don't expect…he's not the same right now…"

Luna nodded in agreement. "He's not used to being only one whole person. It takes time." She paused and made some more notes on the parchment. "Then I'll interview Dean, of course, about what the Muggleborns were up to. And a few more people that Kingsley suggested. I suspect that the issue will come out in 2 weeks."

"Perfect," said Hermione, a smile plastered on her face. "We're leaving for Australia in 10 days, so we'll be able to avoid the rest of the press." She'd been doing that a lot lately, chirping about things with a smile that she didn't mean.

Luna honed in on Hermione's face and became much less businesslike. "You don't have to pretend to be happy around me. I know what you've been through. I know why you're going to Australia. And Ron and Harry don't need you to pretend." Luna leaned forward. "Is it Ginny? Because you don't have to pretend to be okay for Ginny. She's pretending, too."

Hermione's mouth opened and closed, and she looked at Ron. He shrugged back at her; he knew she was struggling, but Ginny seemed happy. She and Harry were attached at the hip (or whatever), she was _always_ in their business, and she'd somehow convinced mum to let her go to Australia. Granted, Ron was pretty sure she'd done it through some kind of trickery, but she'd done the impossible. There was no way she was just pretending to be okay, right?

Ginny wandered into the kitchen then, and everyone looked at her.

"What?" she asked.

Ron decided to put his questions about his sister aside. He had enough on his plate: Fred's death (and the images in Ron's head from that moment) colored every moment of his life. Hermione was days from a breakdown, Harry avoided leaving the Burrow thanks to the press, and were all still fighting guilt from blowing up the Lovegoods'. The last thing Ron needed was to worry about his sister as well. She was almost an adult; if she needed help, she would ask for it.

"Nothing." Ron said (probably too quickly) and went back to the biscuit he was eating.


	3. Luna takes Potions

**Someone mentioned that Snape also had to teach Luna Potions. And how hilarious that would be. So the idea stuck in my head, and ehre we are. From Ron's perspective, the second half of his 5th year.**

 **February 1996**

"Turn to page 178 in your book. Today we will be following the first steps toward making Polyjuice potion. If rumours are to be believed, some of you…" Snape's gaze lingered over Hermione, who stared defiantly back. "Have more experience with this potion than others." He flicked his wand at the cupboard. "In pairs. Begin."

Ron cursed the agreement he and Harry had made: they rotated partnering with Hermione and Neville. And today it was his turn to partner with Neville.

Ten minutes before the end of the period, Ron was at the end of his rope. Neville was marginally better than expected (and quite good at differentiating all of the random green leaves involved), but something still wasn't right. The potion stunk of vomit and random orange wisps of vapour shimmered above the pot. Ron only remembered a bit about his first venture into Polyjuice-making, and it didn't look right.

At the next station over, Harry and Hermione laughed over a cauldron with a proper-looking potion.

Snape strode between the tables, occasionally stopping to sniff, sigh or grunt. He stopped beside their table and held the bridge of his nose between his fingers.

"Longbottom. Weasley. Clean up this mess and see me after class. This type of incompetence is not acceptable" He then turned to address the room. "The Polyjuice potion appears on both the written and practical portions of the OWL each year. It would be wise for each of you to keep accurate notes as we observe it over the next few weeks."

Ron and Neville scraped the bottom of the cauldron as best they could, but even the Vanishing spell didn't help. They were still scrubbing at the greenish-yellow gunk when Snape dismissed the rest of the class.

Neville began returning his cauldron to storage when Snape stopped them with a sneer. "No, you will stay until I can be assured that no remnants remain. I won't have you blowing up your next potion, although a clean cauldron won't help either of you very much."

"But we've got Defense next…" Neville said, his voice barely audible.

Snape stared at the pair. "I'll send a note to that woman. I'm sure you'll miss nothing of substance." And with a flip of his robes, he walked into his office.

As they sat, chiseling away at the cauldron (Ron somehow conjured a rough scraper), the fourth year Gryffindors and Ravenclaws began filing in.

"Problems, dear brother?" Ginny asked cheerfully as she sat down.

"Yeah, he's a slimy git."

Neville added on, "still better than Defense. I never thought I'd hate someone more than Snape."

Luna glided into the room, her wand over her ear and wearing a Slytherin tie. "Hatred is a waste of energies. You'll get a lurgy." A group of Ravenclaw girls came, tittering amongst themselves. "Excuse me a moment, I do believe those girls mistakenly took my ties and replaced them…" Luna wandered off to the other side of the room.

Ginny peered into the cauldron. "What was it supposed to be?"

"Polyjuice," said Neville. "It's very fussy and I think we put stuff in the wrong order." He picked at the last bits of caked-on potion. "I hope he lets us join Harry and Hermione for the rest. She seems to know what she's doing on this one."

Ron nodded and strangled back a comment. From the look on Ginny's face, she was aware of Hermione's previous experience.

Snape swept through the door and chided the class to sit down. No longer eager to get to Defense, Ron looked to Neville. In one of those unspoken moments, the two simply bent their heads and pretended they were still scrubbing away at their cauldron. Maybe they could waste the whole hour.

Snape barked orders at the room and tapped the blackboard, revealing instructions. "Essence of Dittany. Useful for healing. Madam Pomphrey says supplies are running low, and I thought it would be an excellent opportunity to practice your skills. In pairs. Begin."

Ron fake-scrubbed while thinking about Snape's day. What did he _do?_ Just bark orders and yell at people and swoop around in his stupid cape? Ron tried to catch his sister's eye, but she was deeply concentrated on chopping over at her station, while Luna (her partner) stared out the window with mild interest.

"MISS Lovegood!" Snape bellowed, startling Ron out of his thoughts. Neville dropped the conjured sponge he was pretending to use.

"Yes, Severus?" Her voice was dreamy and clear. She spoke as if he were simply another of her classmates, asking about the weather.

Snape's face reddened. "Professor Snape."

"Yes, Professor Severus Snape?" she said innocently.

He sneered at her. "Do you care to tell me what you're doing?"

"Well, I'm speaking to you, of course."

It was something that Harry might say, but Harry's tone would have been different. Harry would have been sarcastic, while Luna was all innocence and wonder. Watching the vein on Snape's forehead pulse, Ron was pretty sure this would be the highlight of his week.

The whole class was silent, watching Snape and Luna. Except Ginny. She simply kept chopping away at the dittany sprigs, as if nothing were amiss. In fact, if one didn't know her as well as Ron did, they would miss the smile in the corner of her lips and the way her eyes danced with merriment.

"Your partner is beginning the dittany extract. It would be your best course of action to begin the remainder of the potion on the right side of the board." He went and sat down at his desk, furiously scribbling.

Luna remained standing, staring at the board as if it were something new to her. "Severus?" she asked, after several seconds of silence.

"Professor. Snape."

"Yes, well, I was looking at the ingredient list, and I was wondering how you obtained your shrake spines? You see, if you harvest the spines and release the fish back into the wild, they will struggle to find their school again. But if the spines are harvested from already-dead fish, the dittany will be less effective."

"As per our previous discussions, you are not to question to origin of any potions ingredients."

"I thought that only applied to Fairy Wings?"

Snape rubbed his temples and began rummaging in a drawer. "It applies to everything, Miss Lovegood."

"Did you read the last issue of the Quibbler?" she asked earnestly.

Snape stared intently at her. She stared back. Ginny almost shook with soundless laughter.

"That publication is banned in this school. This is your final warning."

"Well, Daddy wrote a fascinating article about the morality of gathering potions ingredients. You see, he believes that the Ministry, by poorly regulating the sale of things like shrake spines, is purposefully seeking to reduce the numbers of some creatures. I do believe that you'd benefit from—"

"SILENCE, Miss Lovegood. Return to your potion."

Luna began dutifully grinding things in her mortar, humming a song into the silence. The other Ravenclaws began to titter amongst themselves again, with glances in Luna's direction. Ginny was boiling some of the dittany sprigs and watching what Luna was doing.

As the volume of the room rose again, Neville leaned over to Ron. "This is brilliant. Much better than Umbridge."

"We're stuck with Malfoy, and Ginny gets Luna in potions. Not fair."

Snape began walking around the room again, offering suggestions or (more often) insults as he inspected everyone's cauldrons. Ron and Neville returned to frantically pretending to clean their cauldron.

Snape let out a long sigh as he passed Ginny and Luna's table. "Miss Lovegood…" he began, but trailed off. As if he didn't have the energy for the conversation.

"Yes, Mr. Severus?"

Snape stared into space for a few seconds, moving his mouth without words.

"Is he praying?" Neville whispered to Ron. Ron could only shrug and watch from the corner of his eye.

Snape gave in and voiced his thoughts. "Miss Lovegood, what have you added to your cauldron?"

"Oh, a bit of this and that. The dittany we make at home stings less than Madam Pomphrey's. So I'm following that recipe," Luna said with a smile. It seemed the cheerier she got, the more annoyed Snape became. It was fantastic.

"We've had this conversation."

Luna looked to the board and chirped, "yes we have." And continued adding what looked like coriander to the cauldron. From Ron's best recollection, coriander was _not_ in that potion.

"Throw it out." Snape's voice was low, threatening.

"No, thank you. If I became injured by a rogue nargle or cursed quill, I'd prefer to be treated with this version." She began humming to herself again as she counted out shrake spines.

One look at Snape's red face, and Ron couldn't help it. The snort of laughter escaped him before he could think.

"WEASLEY!" Roared Snape, turning his attention to Ron. "LONGBOTTOM!"

"Yes?" asked Ron, Neville, and Ginny (with a bit of a cheeky smile). Snape shot her a dirty look.

"Your cauldron is sufficiently clean. You may return to defense."

"They really do like to clean each others' cauldrons," Ginny added so only Luna and Ron could hear.

Neville scurried over to return it to storage, and Ron looked at Luna. She was happily stirring her potion. Snape appeared to be gathering control over himself as he looked Ron and Neville up and down.

"The two of you. Twelve inches of parchment each. Explain how to detect the use of Polyjuice and how to avoid detection when using Polyjuice. Due tomorrow. Dismissed."

Ron and Neville hurried out the door, just in time to hear Luna say sweetly, "Professor Severus? What do you believe would happen if you put dittany on a vampire?"

As soon as they were in the hall, the pair looked at one another.

"Think we can get demoted to fourth year potions?" Ron asked.

Neville smiled. "You know, that was always a fear of mine…but it would be worth it."

"She's brilliant."

And they walked slowly to the Defense classroom.


End file.
